Donnie Darko 2001

This transmission follows a teenage human named Donnie who begins experiencing irregularities in time, space, and mood. He is visited by a tall figure in a grotesque rabbit suit who informs him that the world will end in 28 days. Donnie accepts this information without requesting credentials.

Shortly after, an aircraft engine falls through his home. He survives only because he was not in bed. This is the first of many improbable events. Donnie begins sleepwalking, damaging property, and speaking in cryptic terms. He also discusses time travel with a local educator who provides a diagram involving arrows and spirals. This appears to clarify nothing.

The rabbit — named Frank — continues to appear. He speaks in riddles and occasionally issues commands. Donnie follows them. These include vandalism, arson, and the rearrangement of household appliances. At no point does Donnie request a second opinion.

Around him, other humans display confusion, fear, and bursts of moral certainty. One female teaches children to dance. Another teaches fear-based self-help seminars. Both are treated as authorities. Neither survives scrutiny.

Eventually, Donnie concludes that he is inside a “tangent universe” — a breakaway version of reality caused by a malfunction in spacetime. To restore balance, he must die at the correct moment so that the original timeline can resume. He complies.

The timeline resets. Most humans remember nothing. One or two appear unsettled, but quickly resume standard behavior.

Conclusion: When confronted with cosmic disorder, humans invent metaphors, assign blame, and follow masked animals. They are more interested in meaning than accuracy, and will accept destruction if it restores emotional symmetry.

If Nebulon ever ruptures Earth’s reality, the population will spend most of its time interpreting it instead of fixing it. Exploitable.