Common human phrases

Words that signal danger, lies, or impending death

Humans in movies repeat certain lines in key situations. The results are usually predictable, and rarely good.

“Only two days until retirement.” This phrase is said by older humans, usually wearing a uniform. It is never true. Once this is spoken, the human is almost always killed before retirement can occur. No one on Earth has ever survived two more days after saying this.

“It’s not what it looks like.” This phrase is said by someone who has clearly been caught doing exactly what it looks like. Usually with someone else’s spouse. The phrase does not change the outcome.

“Stay in the car.” This order is always ignored. The human told to stay will immediately leave the car, enter a dangerous situation, and make everything worse.

“I’ll be right back.” They won’t. If this is said, the human is either about to die or return in a dramatically worse condition. Either way, they are not “right back.”

“We’ve got company.” This does not mean guests. It means enemies, usually armed, approaching quickly. The phrase is delivered with deep concern but no helpful detail.

“You’re going to want to see this.” The human being addressed never wants to see it. It is almost always a body, a monster, or something on fire. But they look anyway.

Conclusion: These phrases appear to be part of a strange ritual. Humans say them as if they are helpful, but they always lead to bad outcomes. No one learns. They just keep saying them.

Nebulon agents should treat these phrases as warnings. When a human says one, something dangerous, embarrassing, or extremely loud is likely to follow. Brace accordingly.